Bitter Ass Bitch

She was the friend that I had never expected to ask me this fucking vanilla question.

“Mel, when are you gonna have kids? You would make such a great mom.”

Misery likes company eh? A thought.  A quick thought.  A long thought.   I almost had the nerve to ask, “So when are you gonna get a divorce?”

I didn’t.  I feel like it is as just as inappropriate to ask a lady when she is going to bear children as it is to when she is going to leave her lame ass husband or drown her whiny ass kid.

To be truthful.  I do not support killing your children, but I guess as annoyed and anxious as you are about me having a child, I am equally as ready for you to make your kid shut the fuck up.

I get it. Both ridiculous. Both uncalled for.

But seriously, can you get your kid to shut the fuck up?

I am trying to have a conversation with my once sexy ass vibrant friend.

Is this just age?  You watch your once colorful friends fold into a bland ass manila envelope.

I’ll do without.  Khaki always looked like shit on me.

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